weed for a reason

i got to the point where no matter how much weed i smoked, i plateaued at a mid-level high at best. i kept preparing myself for the cold-turkey dip. it's gonna happen, and i'm not giving in -- i'm not texting my guy. when i run out, then i'll be out, and that's what's going to happen.

maximum estimation of sobriety, roughly a week. not so inclined to believe it, although giving it a think makes it appear as so. and what a terrible week.

smoking weed ceases my ego voice and lets me hear from higher sources. it's been a week of emotional response to petty trivialities. a week of what was traditionally my personal hell.

when i'm stoned, i think that smoking weed is logical and not that big of a deal. when i'm not stoned, i guilt myself over the monetary aspect of getting stoned regularly. but feeling peace at the end of each day is a blessing -- the universe probably brought me to weed for a reason.